Owning up to your thoughts
I’ve had a few confusing and upsetting days of late. The feelings of uselessness and hopelessness have taken over and nearly ruined my days with my girlfriend. I was so upset at a moment, and reacted badly, that I got in the car and drove off for an while. I am struggling with dealing with small, some would say, incidental situations. This is why I am going and have Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). To help me think about my thoughts (I know that sounds strange) and change how I react to the world around me.
Taking CBT is making me realise that owning your own thoughts and not projecting is the first step to truly changing. That includes owning up to how you are and your depression. And how your thoughts and actions can impact on others.
I now realise that admitting to yourself and others, that you have depression or a mental illness problems, will open you up to important understanding and discussions with the people that matter in your life.
I find that I react quite negativily when I think someone is out to hurt me or trying to manipulate me. It’s seems to be part of who I am now and I’m starting to get the sense that it always will be.
I’m at a place where I don’t know where I belong or where I’m going. My depression is trying to kill me and everything I want for myself in my life.
I don’t know how to end this. Here will do.